Only Human

There is a lot to catch up on this week. I was beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I began taking birth control pills last week to start regulating my cycle and help calm everything down. I was getting excited about starting meds because that meant closer to holding a sweet Baby Vines in my arms. However, I did not count on getting bad news before the process got started. I received the dreaded news of another abnormal pap smear. They wanted me to come into the office and have a colposcopy done which takes a larger biopsy and special dyes helps them distinguish the stage of dysplasia is present. I have been down this road before. Two years ago I received the same news and discovered i had the worst dysplasia before the word cancer. So they took out the parts of my cervix that help the cells on it. (sorry if TMI). This surgery has lead to a lot of pain and frustration throughout my fertility surgery. They have to dilate my cervix with a metal rod for each IUI which is nearly unbearable for me. They have also had a lot of concern on whether or not I would be able to easily carry a child term. So the possibility of another surgery is absolutely detrimental to this journey. I know that God is in control, but it just seems like once I get my hopes up I get kicked back down. 

I also get a call while I am at the beach with my family from my doctor saying they would like me to see a gynecology oncologist this time for the biopsy in hopes they can take less tissue this time. I am just praying this is all a false alarm and everything is fine!

On a happier note, I did go to the beach with my mom, dad, Nana and Papaw. It was a nice getaway, but not nearly long enough! We had a little adventure during the trip due to Nana having a seizure in the shower with the door locked! We finally got in and discovered she was okay. Just a scratch on her back, bless her heart.  We ate some great food and had irreplaceable family time.

I also got a list from the doctor this week of all the medications I will take during this process. I will have a visual for you later but here is a sneak peak!

Microdose Leuprolide Acetate ~ 10 units injected 2 times a day

Gonal F ~ 225 units injected once daily

Menopur 75~ 150 units injected daily 

hCG 10,000 units (Pregnyl) injected once

Crinone vaginal gel- Inserted once daily after egg retrieval

Medrol 16mg 5 tablets

Doxycycline- 2 tablets

Estradiol 2mg two times a day

Baby Aspirin 81mg a day

Xanax the day of transfer

So I will be a hormone raging pin cushion in a couple weeks if all goes well with my appointment tomorrow!!

Thanks for the prayers!